Doing and Dealing

How are we nearing the end of April. HOW?

I'll tell you how, life has been so crazy busy that the days are passing in a mahoosive blur. The kind of blur that makes me feel entirely exhausted and just a leetle bit over sensitive! Using the wrong jug to froth milk? I will take you down. You know, that kind of over sensitive.

I'm 37 weeks pregnant today (so I am allowed to be irrational - OKAY?!)  and boy, am I feeling it. I'm still don't have the biggest of bumps but I am really aware of the extra weight I'm lugging around. When I stand up, I can feel it all going into my pelvis and lower back. Even when I lie down, there is just... this weight. Walking is slow. I am slow! With just three weeks to go until my due date though, this is pretty good going I reckon. I am tired, mind you. I feel wiped. Physically and mentally.

Even though we had a week away on holiday we just haven't stopped. For months. It's just been constant. TB'd dad was giving me a row last week for painting. I didn't want to be painting. Let's make that clear - I am over it! But the carpet was coming, and this baby is coming. Shit's gotta get done.

I did lose the plot a few days later when I was trying to paint the lower wall and it just wasn't happening (bending down is not part of my range any more). The tears came and through my wailing I tried to explain to TB that I'd had enough and maybe it would be easier to just go back to being two. Just us. How's that's possible I don't know but at the time it seemed like a very appealing idea. I'm definitely getting more teary again. Work has been proper mental too, which has been getting me down but I've broken the back of a VERY challenging project and I've just got this week and next - and then I am DONE!

After my painting meltdown we did get bedroom finished before the carpet arrived on Monday. So we're back in our bedroom, the baby's chest of drawers is built up and stocked. We are gaining control!  I also got my kitchen shelves up which I am love with. I've been planning these for quite some time! You gotta love those jobs where you can select a few lovely items and place them with care. I've been dreaming about using my new le creuset tea pot for over a year!

The rest of the house is bonkers messy though. I got a huge pile of baby clothes from my sister in law (which I've washed and put away), along with various bouncy chairs, a Moses basket and other stuff I've not had a chance to look at. Lucky me! But where does all this new stuff go?

 It's all been chucked into our front room that has no furniture in it (which we are lucky to have) but it  has sort of been our DIY dumping ground. Currently there are piles of kitchen cabinet off-cuts, our old cooker, paint pots, bits of an old kitchen table, ALL the tools - as well as our new pram and car seat!  Just shutting the door on it just now. Cannot deal. Don't actually need to deal - this is what I must remind myself. We have done a power of work. Not everything needs to be sorted in one go.

I've been really excited to have our baby, but also scared. What have we let ourselves in for? My mindset kind of changed at the weekend. My childhood best friend was due six days before me. She had to get induced early and had her baby on Sunday; a wee girl. She's got her baby. She knows what she looks like. I want to meet mine. I can't wait.

Fatty boom boom BOOM

Holy crap. I stepped on the scales this morning. Oh my god. MY GOD.

I am kind of laughing about it because I am indeed carrying a 5.5lb human being inside me right now, not to mention all the other bobbins that goes with it - and the gigantic boobs - but I'll say it again... Holy Crap.

I'm 16 stone! Ha! SIXTEEN! Jesus wept. In fact, he sobbed his little heart out. This is unchartered territory for me. I used to talk about Fresh Fat (FF) when I was losing weight. Well, this is FF alright, just fresh fat that has gone ON. And I've still got over a month to go. Dear God.

This means I have put on 3stone. That's some amount of weight. I hope you're suitably impressed. That takes skill. No wonder my feet are sore!

My heaviest ever was 15 and a half stone. Those were not fun days. Thing is, I don't think I look like I did then. My face certainly ain't quite as chubby. That's something I have to thank the ageing process for, I suppose.

Oh well, here I am and there's not much I can do about it now. A few months time though.... oh it is all kicking off! Frumpy mamma, I am not going to be.

Shaping up - and out

Hols were fab.

Lazy and fab. There was a lot of lounging around, reading, napping and eating. Perfect. I'm really feeling the extra weight so it was just what I wanted. Getting myself up off a low seat or couch and tying my shoe laces are no longer easy tasks so throwing on a sun dress and  pair of flip flops was just about my limit.

We got home really late on Sunday night, got up at lunchtime on Monday and came back to work on Tuesday. However, things at home have progressed a good deal as we came home to two new velux windows in the room we're cutting in half to make two smaller rooms, and our bedroom is totally plastered ready for painting. On top of that the kitchen floor is finished and our dining table and sideboard arrived on Monday.

So finally, we have a (just about) completed kitchen. Sitting at the table to eat our tea on Monday night felt amazing! Last night we unpacked our remaining wedding gifts (which was most of them!) and got them put away/in use/on the wall. Only taken us the best part of a year! It's been worth the wait though. Hello le creuset tea pot and Orla Kiely cake tins! I must get some pics.

That's the house - all coming along nicely. A bit like the pregnancy! I've got 5 weeks until my due date. Holy crap. So that means it could be three weeks or seven weeks. My palms just got a bit sweaty. I am not even joking.

The baby is wriggling ALL. THE. TIME. It's wee bottom often pushes out just above my belly button and there is a foot on the left hand side that loves to poke out. It's the weirdest thing. I love it but I am feeling so crushed in there - especially when I am sitting at my desk all day long. The baby weighs about five and a half pounds so that means there are still a good two or more to go. How it's all going to fit in there I do not know. It really tight as it with gasp inducing punches getting lower all the time. Ouch!

I had an appointment on Monday with the midwife who gave me the usual once over - blood pressure, bump measurements etc. and as has been the way with the whole pregnancy - textbook. The baby is in the right position and I am feeling fine so all good. I've been really lucky. We talked through my birth plan which I am pretty relaxed about. Actually, I'm pretty relaxed about the whole labour part. Sure, when I think about it, my heart goes a little faster and the thought of squeezing a human out my vagina makes me wince but I'm not worried about it. This baby is going to come out one way or the other so there is no point in getting worked up about it or having a fixed way in mind that I want to do things. Although fast and pain free would be lovely!