Tuesday 25 March 2014

Cup runeth under

Boobs. They're great, aren't they. Who doesn't like boobs.

I've always been a boob lover. I used to go to my Granny's House every day for lunch when I was at primary school. I vividly remember reading The Sun everyday. I could not wait to check out page 3 and see what that day's boobs looked like. Would mine look like that? How big are mine going to be? And most importantly, when will I get them?!

My boobs could not come quick enough. I was so excited to get them. Especially as my mum has got a great set. Oh boy, was I in line for a right pair. Primary school finished and that summer, aged 11, I got my first bra - a AA cup from Marks and Spencer. Not that I had anything to put in them but c'mon, I was going up to the big school and crop tops were not going to cut it.

The months turned into years and before I knew it, I was 16 and sporting a full set of... B cups. That was all! A b cup! Where were my massive bajungas?! Despite sporting the same massive backside as my mother, I somehow had missed the boob gene she had been graced a plenty with! What the chuff? The b's didn't last too long though as aged 17, that's when I started to pile on the pounds. And the lard isn't fussy, it goes on all over so my B-cups soon became a C. And then a D. And then a DD. So great, I had bigger boobs. I also had bigger everything.

Then it all kinda happened in reverse. As I've lost weight over the past 8 years or so (Holy Crap - has it been that long I've been doing this?!), I've lost some great bras as they are just too big. To be honest, I was happy to get back down to a D cup, and a full C was just peachy. I thought to myself that the B cup I once sported (can you sport a boob size?) was just because I was so young. Wrong. All my bras are now too big. And no one likes a baggy bra.

Every time I glance down I can see my little baps nestling in my bra. Just resting in there like they are in a wee hammock. I don't think I'm quite a B cup but I'm not a kick in the shirt away from it! This is not ideal. Apart from the fact I no longer have any cleavage, I need to go and buy a whole load of new bras for my wee totties! And sports bras too. At least any boob I do have is grade A boob. I just hope it doesn't become A cup, boob.

PS) Thanks for all the wedding reading suggestions. The search continues...

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