Monday 22 November 2010

Squeaky clean slate

TB was visiting me for most of the weekend and it was fantastic, apart from a bit of an argument we had.

We went out with a few of his mates on Saturday night. I was meeting them for the first time and after quite a lot of drinks I was totally smashed (which played a bit part when it came to my reaction). I took the hump when he sort of told me not to stand too close to him. I thought he was being an dickhead and so flounced off to the other side of the club. He was actually feeling a bit sick and didn't want me pressing against him - which he explained when he came after me. So I got over that and it was all cool and then later on, towards the end of the night we were dancing - me and him and two of his mates. I went off to the loo and decided to have a quick ciggie afterwards. I went back inside only to find he was annoyed cause he thought that I had just walked off and left him again and his mates were asking where I'd gone and he didn't know.

So a stupid fight about nothing at all. However, things were a bit tense. It was time to go home anyway and we skulked off. On the way home I ended up coming out with it all - and a few tears. Just the usual fear that I've mentioned on here - that he didn't want things as much as I did and that I really wanted it to work. He told me that of course he did - he wouldn't be seeing me just about every weekend if he didn't want to and the fact that he was really hurt by his ex and so he wouldn't get involved with someone if he didn't think it wasn't going to go somewhere. He also told me I need to let go of my last relationship and stop thinking that they way it panned out is what's going to happen with us. (Channelling some Moonraker behaviour there)

So despite having our first argument, I feel fine about it all. We had a really nice day yesterday, watching a film and reading the Sunday papers (and eating a fry up - whoops) and I don't feel the dread or anything like that. In fact, in a way I'm glad we had it. Weirdo.

1 comment:

  1. Tend to forget how difficult new relationships are till you start to understand how the other thinks a bit better - so much angst sometimes! Now to further matters - been talking to Shauna on FB - we need to plan a night for the three of us to catch up when I'm over there. Shauna says we need to book a spot in your calendar since you're always so goddam busy. So I arrive on 27th Dec and will be pretty family orientated till after New Year I'd say but then I'm here till the 14th - so could you consult your social calendar and see if you can fit us in - maybe around the 5th or 6th? Let me know what you think Zxx

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Go on then, spill.