So - let me bring you up to speed with how life is going. And when I say life, I mean dieting - which kinda is my life.
After my post the other day I carried on with being really good during the day but by night... I was opening cupboards and looking for food like a woman possessed. You know that way where you keep going into the kitchen cupboards to see what you can eat. There is nothing and so you go away again - only to come back but 10 minutes later to do the same thing? Yeah - that. Except I did it enough times that eventually I did find something to eat.
On the plus side, I went out on Tuesday night and did 10 miles on the bike. Boom. Very pleased. I did eat too many boiled sweets afterwards and also half a slice of toasted cheese... but at least I got out there and moved my backside.
I didn't go to bootcamp last night. I ended up getting stuck into some more tidying in the flat, which actually has made me feel better mentally. As for what I ate, could have been worse. 2 bags of crisps, 5 boiled sweets and a handful of cheese should not have featured.
I woke up this morning and something has happened. I don't know what but I just feel like something has clicked. I'm having issues exercising at the moment but when I lost over 4lbs in 10 days recently, I had only been out for 3 runs in that time. It's what's going in my face that matters. I can do this. The only person stopping me is me. When I'm in control I feel SO much better. I might not look at all better but I FEEL it. Only I can bring that feeling back - and I could get it in a matter of days. I've eaten the same thing today as I have the past few days yet somehow... I dunno, I realise that I am eating the right things. I just need to aknowlege the positive choices and keep them going.
While writing this something else has dawned on me... I think my period is coming early. My boobs have been really sore for 2 days now and I just felt a twinge. That would explain a LOT.
I'm dashing about after work today (a few miles of power walking) to get fancy dress costumes organised but TB is going out at 9pm. What's to stop me cracking out a few lunges and squats. It's not exactly a full on sweat fest - but it's something. Right? Then I'm gonna have a bath. That's right. A mother fucking bath. Just some time to make myself feel good - and away from any food.
'You know that way where you keep going into the kitchen cupboards to see what you can eat.' Yep, to the point where I have ended up standing in the kitchen eating lime pickle straight out of the jar! Hope this week goes better for you. I have had a rough one myself diet-wise and I was only thinking today that I don't know why I allow myself to do it as I KNOW I feel better when I eat better.
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