Festive weigh in

Holy crap. Today is definitely a day for using the lord's name - 1.5lbs off.

Say WHAT?! Best Christmas present I could have ever given myself... 12 stone 4.75lbs.

Merry Christmas, I'm off to gorge on Lindt balls!

Starting Weight: 14 stone 0.25lbs
Current Weight: 12 stone 4.75lbs
Weight Loss This Week: 1.5lb
Total 2013 Weight Loss: 1stone 9.5lbs

Living the dream

It's safe to say 2013 has been a pretty incredible year for me.

Everything I've ever wanted is coming true. I live in a beautiful, big house with three cats and I am in love with and am loved by the most incredible person I've ever met - who I'm marrying in five months time. I am so lucky.

And to top it all off, I've managed to kick the arse out the weight loss charade and am the lightest I can ever remember being for around 15 years.  This is all the stuff dreams are made of! I can actually say with some certainty, I am living the dream, MY dream.

I'm excited for 2014. I just want to keep the good feelings going; in love, in weight loss, in work - everything really! The wedding is a big focus and I know the first six months of the year are going to be busy busy. I'm ready for it though and I'm ready to be married to TB, to start the next chapter of our life together.

I'm also ready to get into the 11 stones! I'm a bit nervous about the festive feasting that could derail things but I also feel a kind of calm about it all. I'm weighing in on Christmas Day and I would love to see a loss. The odd chocolate coin has snuck past my lips but I've determined to delay the eating with abandon as long as possible. Boxing day.... well, who knows, I might even go for a run. I know! What the chuff has happened to me?!

Lots of festive love to you all and here's to a Christmas Day filled with food! xxxx

Weigh in

Half a pound off. I feel that's fair.

I had a big loss last week and I have definitely struggled a little over the past few days.  So when I saw 12 stone 6.25lbs flash up this morning, I was pleased there was a loss at all! Sometimes when I lose a good few pounds in one week I don't really believe it till the following week - so to see 12 stone 6 was still brilliant. Feels great!

What also felt great, but also a little embarrassing, was the size 14 coast dress I wore to a black tie do on Tuesday (where I had a little wine and ate half the pudding). I wore this dress when I was a bridesmaid in October 2011. I originally bought a size 16 but soon realised the 14 was the better fit, which felt so good. A size 14 dress from Coast? Get in! But it now looks like the 14 is too big! It's strapless and kept slipping down and I had to do that thing where you are continually pulling it up. Classy. But who cares! I was flipping delighted!


Reflected buy the midweek wine and ice cream consumption, the festive munchies are definitely starting to creep in and when hanging lindt balls from the tree (oh yeah, we like to go all out with our edible decs!) it would have been so easy to scoff a couple but I really want to give these last six days before weigh in, and indeed Christmas Day, a big push. I would bloody love to see 12 stone 5.75lbs - or less, next week. It would be a Christmas miracle!

In the last week I've been to spinning, run 5 miles and been to bodypump. This week the plan is spinning today, a 5 mile run tomorrow and on Christmas Eve too. Even if I was to stay the same next week, I'll have not have gone bonkers and started stuffing my face - kicking off a possible fortnight of festive face filling.

Starting Weight: 14 stone 0.25lbs
Current Weight: 12 stone 6.25lbs
Weight Loss This Week: 0.5lb
Total 2013 Weight Loss: 1stone 8lbs

Before and after

Another busy weekend - and finally, we have finished the living room! Horay!

There are a few things we still need to do (paint and attach the mantelpiece, varnish the window frame, get a mirror up above the mantelpiece as well as pics on the walls and finish placing ornaments and stacking books) but we are moved in and I love it!

You can see how it looked when we went to view it and now that it's been brought ever so slightly up to date! I can't quite seem to get my pic taken from as far back an angle as the top pic, but you get the idea.

I feel the pics don't quite reflect the hours and hours of work this one room took. You don't see the two undercoats, the hands and knees grinding of paint stance, the sanding of every inch of paintwork (and there was a lot of paintwork - check the skirtings!).  The window and fire are also new. Let's not even being to think about how much money we're spending on the house overall.

It's been another good week diet and exercise wise... spinning on Thursday, 8km run on Friday and bodypump yesterday. However, there have been a couple of slips that have snuck in. Firstly,  I made a couple of traybakes on Sunday for TB's charity coffee morning at work and I ended up eating a slice of 'sticky stuff' (basically my very naughty version of Rice Krispy Squares) as well as picking at tablet and a few maltesers. Ooops.

Last night I sat on the couch all night  and also ate some crisps - a double hit of no movement and extra calories. Tsk tsk. I've got to get my head screwed on straight as I've got a black tie dinner tonight where I'll need to turn down the wine as much as possible and flat out refuse the pudding. Weigh in looms!

Peridot asked me what I'm doing foodwise. I'm not one for counting points, calories or... well, anything really. I'm just trying to avoid anything unhealthy or processed. A typical day is:

B: Melon and yogurt or porridge with honey
S: clementine or two
L: Homemade soup i.e. spicy pumpkin and chicken or butternut squash with chilli (no bread)
S: clementine or two - if anything
D: chilli and sweet potato or healthy fish pie, low fat choc yogurt

Other than that I might snack on some cold meat and a couple of boiled sweets. That's about it really. I'm also really trying to watch the portions. My meals are all made from scratch and I do try and make them as low fat as possible but that's usually me just adapting them to have more veg/less oil etc. Hope this helps!

I'm missing my usual Tuesday night swim tonight so I'm off for a stomp around the streets in my lunch-hour.

Weigh in

Last week's half pound was most definitely a red herring... because this morning I'm 2.75lbs lighter! Boooo YA!

I can't actually believe it. Almost three pounds off. That means I saw 12stone 6.75lbs on the scales. What?! WHAT?! I honestly have no idea when I last saw that number. I don't know if I have ever actually seen it. I was about 11 stone at school and then I really had very little to do with the scales until they had jumped up quite a bit past 12 stone 6.  So exciting!

I have worked for it though - a 7km run and an 8km run as well as swimming (which I dragged my mum to when she was visiting). And the eating has been stellar. STELLAR!

Speaking of my Mum, she is doing really well too and we've agreed that we're going to keep the focus for as long as possible - and our last weigh in before Christmas will be... Christmas Day. Why not? TB and I are hosting Christmas and I see no reason to dive head first into a selection box before then. If I eat and drink like a merry old thing for the best part of a week untold damage could be done and with the wedding inching every closer, I don't have time to gain and re-lose half a stone.  I can't believe I am about to say this... 11stones, I'm coming to getcha!

Starting Weight: 14 stone 0.25lbs
Current Weight: 12 stone 6.75lbs
Weight Loss This Week: 2.75lb
Total 2013 Weight Loss: 1stone 7.5lbs

Am I smaller or the boys bigger? ;)

I don't care - BELIEVE ME

My objective on Saturday night was to look smokin' hot.  I felt great and I got some lovely compliments so I'm going to take that as goal met.

As I knew I would, I saw the married one. And as I knew it would be, it was totally fine. We blethered away and all was good. I also chatted away to two of my female friends who are going to be part of this same team that they are all (TB too) involved in next year.

As soon as I saw them they both made reference to the fact TB is now part of that close knit team (and by default me too) and that there is history with me and the married one. For example one of the girls used to be invovled with someone who was part of the team before. She said : "I'm glad I'm not the one things will be awkward for anymore!".  Then later on the other girl said to me: "It'll be all be fine." I replied: "I know. I'm fine about it all. I just think it's quite interesting (i.e. married one's decision to involve TB)".

At the time I didn't think anything more about it but then the next day it dawned on me that they think there is some sort of issue with the married one and I. There's not. Okay, I won't lie. I've seen him pawing over other girls and I don't like it. I have no right to be irritated by it and it's not that I wish I was them. I just don't like it. My ego doesn't like it. The married one knows that. I don't like that he knows that but well, he does.

But this is all just...  nothing. None of it matters. I don't care about anyone except TB. The married one can flirt and come on to the world and it's wife - I might feel a little jealous but he means nothing to me. My concern is that TB gets wind (thanks to chat from others) that there is some sort of problem/tension with TMO (the married one) and wonders what it's all about. I do find it interesting that TMO has created a situation where TB and I will see him a lot more between now and the summer - and will be living on top of each other for two weeks in the summer. But who cares - it's TB and me. We're a team and I just want to make sure that others are aware of that withouth me trying to look like I'm protesting too much.

Weigh in

Bit late with the weigh in report.... half a pound on. Hmmmm.

Not so happy about that, obviously. Despite my boozy Saturday night I really don't feel it's just but well, that's how it is. This all happened on Thursday - four day ago now. So it's old news and I've pretty much forgotten about it. Since then I have been like a laser - could not be more focused.

Okay, that's not quite true. Food wise, I have been amazing. Drink wise, I've had two heavy nights on the sauce. That's not great but I with all the challenges facing me (everyone eating chips and cheese halfway through the night and hangover recovery for example) I feel like I was a bloody champion.

On Friday night at my work Christmas meal, I shunned the bread roll with starter and gave away my pudding. I couldn't have been more resolute.

And earlier in the day I ran 7.64km! That's my furthest yet! I won't lie. I was pretty chuffed with myself. So as you can tell I am on a mission to lose that half pound this week - and some more. If I could lose a pound I'd be happy. That would be great.

Starting Weight: 14 stone 0.25lbs
Current Weight: 12 stone 9.5lbs
Weight Loss This Week: + 0.5lb
Total 2013 Weight Loss: 1stone 4.75lbs

Chubby fingers crossed

Weigh day again tomorrow. It seems to have come round again so quickly.

I've done all my usual workouts and so I feel confident that I worked hard on that front. In fact, I forgot to mention just how hard I worked on my Friday run. 7.5km without stopping! And at a good pace too! I really am surprising myself with the old running malarkey. The first km or so and the last km always seem to the be the hardest but I feel quite determined on each run I go  - so there is no half measures.I know I'm working hard at spinning as last week I was almost sick. Nice.

The only thing that has let me down was the Saturday night boozing. There is the booze I drank and there is also the effect it will have had on my body. What that was, who knows. Tomorrow is a really early weigh in as I'm away on a training course so at 5.30 IN THE AM (ugh) I will be hopping on the scales. A loss. That's all I want - just a loss.

Stay classy

Saturday night started off so well. Sushi and drinks with friends. However, with not that much sushi and a lot of drink, it all kinda went downhill very quickly.

I met TB and a couple of his friends when I arrived home on the train, when I was pretty tipsy. I don't really remember much of the night after that. I do know I drank even more. I remember arguing with TB, I know I left the club on my own and then I know I had an argument with a guy outside and I remember crying. Not cool.

Most of it is a blur and I have no idea who the person I was arguing with or what about. I feel sick when I think about it. What the hell was going on. I am so embarrassed. I've not been that drunk for a long time and I know I was not being a nice drunk.

Suffice to say Sunday was pretty much a total write off and even today I don't feel quite myself. I think it's more the dread or 'the paras' as my friends and I used to call it. You know that feeling in the pit of your stomach  - the one where it feels like you're about to get found out for doing something really bad.

This Friday is my work Christmas night out and I am determined not to drink too much. I'm too horrified by my behaviour on Saturday. Shudder. I am too old for this crap.

TB and I also have a last minute night out coming up. This Saturday is a big night out for a huge group of our friends that takes place annually. We weren't going to go but TB decided he fancied it so we're going. I'm looking forward to it but I don't see these friends for months at a time, and I wanted to be thinner! Why is that always the first and overriding thought that goes with every occasion?  'How fat was I last time I saw these friends?' 'What will I wear?' 'Will anyone think I look thinner?'

There is also going to be someone from my past there, the married one. I've seen him plenty of times over the past year so it's no big deal. What I'm not sure about is he and TB are going to be spending more time together in the run up to a big event we're all going to next summer. In fact a few of them are all going out for dinner before the night out on Saturday. I'm not sure how I feel about this and I'm pretty sure the married one know that I'm probably not totally okay with it. I don't really know what else to say about it apart from I'll be doing two things on Saturday. 1. Not drinking too much and 2. Looking smokin hot.

Weigh in

Holy shrinking arse, Batman. 2.25lbs off!

What the hell is going on? You know the fairytale about the cobblers shoes and the wee elves that come alive at night...well I think they must be having a go on my scales. I can't actually believe this.

I suppose when I think back over the week, I AM putting the work in. I just can't believe the losses I am getting week after week. It's not like me. Not at all. This is the lightest I have EVER been. That doesn't seem real. To write that down. It's something I've thought about so many times and it just seems to have suddenly arrived.

So what am I doing? I feel like I need to note it down so that when I need inspiration in the future and I am struggling see past ice cream, sweeties and well, anything that's not nailed down, I can remind myself what works for me.  Now that I think about it, that's actually not the problem time. The problem time is when I am trying to be good and I feel like I'm putting the work in but I get zero results or a paltry quarter pound here and there.

Exercise. I'm working out about four times a week just now. That is usually two runs, spinning and swimming. I can definitely feel my fitness improving and I know I am working hard during each of these workouts. I mean, I ran 7km the other day without stopping and at 6.20mins per km! Pow pow!

Food. This is where I really need to pay attention as this is when I can often cross the fine line between eating healthily to maintain or dieting. Yeah, yeah - we're not supposed to be on a diet. We're supposed to change our lifelong eating habits. I have done that. I have changed them and oh my god, I am such a healthy eater but to lose weight, I gotta be on a diet. I gotta go without and sometimes feel a little hungry.  That's the reality.

What am I eating... for breakfast it's mostly melon and low fat yogurt. Sometimes porridge with a little honey. And not huge portions. I might have a couple of clementines before lunch, which is usually soup. I've got into the habit of making a massive portion of soup on Monday and freezing individual portions so I've constantly got a varied supply to choose from. This week's was spinach and chicken Thai style (which I  just made up) and last week was cauliflower. I just have the soup - no bread or crackers or anything else at all. I might have another piece of fruit before dinner but usually just coffee. I drink a lot of coffee. Probably about 4 big cups a day at least  - and then decaff tea in the evenings.

Evening meals are usually things like chilli and a sweet potato, healthy fish pie, sausage casserole. All really normal stuff. I'm just making sure I have a small portion. Oh, and it's always cooked from scratch. I need to remind myself, it's not some magic formula - it's just being organised - and not snacking.

There is one thing that I am sure is helping. I'm really busy. As soon as we finish our tea most weeknights, we are straight into painting and decorating until at least 9am. That's not exactly burning a load of calories but I'm on the go All. The Time. There is no sitting watching telly for hours on end. And and weekends too. That's gotta add up - right?

So it's heads down for another week - onwards and downwards!


Starting Weight: 14 stone 0.25lbs
Current Weight: 12 stone 9lbs
Weight Loss This Week: 2.25lbs
Total 2013 Weight Loss: 1stone 5.25lbs

Wedding planning perils

I always knew that TB and I would have a short engagement. We want to be married so why wait. 'Let's get this show on the road', has been my engagement catchphrase. And indeed the show is well and truly roadworthy.

I have to confess though, it's not all been hearts and flowers. I honestly envisaged me making decisions and everyone else agreeing with me. I had a fair idea of what I wanted for us and really did think that with every thing I decided upon, people (TB and my family and friends) would be nodding enthusiastically in agreement. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

So TB popped the question and I was cock-a-hoop. Still am! I then proceeded to immediately get myself into a bit of a tizz about choosing the ring but once that was done it was onto thinking about a venue. As I mentioned here  that was not as straight forward as I thought. The venue I had in my head just didn't exist and I also had to contend with TB and my parents' thoughts which really began to annoy. Well, actually it was pissing me off, to be frank. In fact - this is the same thing about lots of different wedding things. I have been pissed off.

I spend hours looking into something - whether it be venue/luxury portaloos/marquees/caterers.  Let's use the venue as the prime example here. I come up with what I think is a great option and I am quite excited about it. I then tell TB about it and thinks the garden is too small/he doesn't really like the location/thinks the house it's too small etc. etc.  I get annoyed and tell him that he needs to make a few suggestions. He looks for ten minutes and finds one place  he likes the look of. I say okay, let's go and see it. In the meantime I tell my mum where we're thinking of and she says: "What? You're thinking of xxxx? Oh no. That's not a great place at all. And it's so far away. Oh no." Aaaaaaaargh! Cannot win. And then it's back to square one and me spending even more time coming up with options. I felt like a go between trying to keep everyone happy but essentially just compromising so that things can move ahead.

Another example... I decided to hire a generator from an independent supplier rather than via the marquee hire company as it's a lot cheaper. I was telling my mum a funny story to do with it and mid sentence she breenges in with: "You're not getting the generator from the same place? Riiiight, well, I'm not sure that's a good idea." Jesus wept! I was just mentioning it in passing - and more criticism.

At the time it felt like I was doing nothing but investigating wedding stuff and no matter what I did I was getting questioned and probed about it all. I would tell TB I had thought of something good and he didn't like it so that was that shot down in flames. I would tell my dad I had found a supplier for something and I was getting grilled on what time they would deliver it, where exactly it would go and how many inches off the ground it would be. GIVE ME STRENGTH!

Where was the support? Where was the "well done for looking into all this stuff by yourself." No-one else was making calls. No-one else was researching. No-one else was coming up with solutions! The only person that was, was getting questioned ALL THE TIME. And I don't like being questioned - on a normal day, never mind about my wedding day.

So then every time I spoke to my parents, TB's parents - who I felt like I was repeating stuff to again and again, I was ready to be questioned and may have been a little sensitive. They knew I was getting annoyed and so there was a whole lot of tension. Oh what a great time full of love and romance.

That is the negative side. That is me feeling a bit ground down by it all and it's not actually a fair representation. It doesn't show that when we presented a run down walled garden to my parents and talked about marquees, making our own canapes, rigging up lighting and making an archway to get married in front of, they nodded and then spent the next two hours talking through with us how they could make our wishes come true.

Our parents will do what they can to make us happy and that's something that makes me want to cry with love when I think about TB, he will do anything to make me happy - I am his priority.

My mum and dad are incredibly practical and the devil is most certainly in the detail. They want to make sure that every eventuality is covered off and that plan A, B and C are in place. They want to make sure on the day, no-one is running around dealing with last minute stresses. They want to enjoy the day. They want everyone else to enjoy the day. They want TB and I to love the day.

At the moment  we're in a little wedding lull. All the key things are booked and I'm just ironing out some details with the caterer and handing out the last few save the dates. We've not yet got into the next level of detail. We're not quite down to millimetre plan of where the chairs will go for the ceremony, or how the glasses are being moved from the marquee to the drinks reception area - at what time and by who - but we soon will be, you can count on that.

You can also count on the fact I'll be questioned within an inch of my life, will also want to throw things and will no doubt have a cream puff or two. But I have to remember that it is all done with love. I cannot wait for the wedding. It's going to be incredible. I cannot wait to be married to TB. Our life together is going to be (already is) incredible. Our families and friends are incredible.

Proud Mary

The diet has been going incredibly well over the past five days with just a couple of small misdemeanours - such as half a bottle of red wine, some of the pastry from the top of a steak pie and a sliver of mint aero cheesecake.

The latter two actually happened when we were at a friend's house for dinner. You know what it's like - hard to say no without being rude. I did insist on a tiny slice and when it arrived I passed it over to TB as it was still massive - and had to ask for an even smaller one.

I also seem to have found my running groove. I actually feel like this is the best I have ever been at running. Even better than when I did the half marathon - which was six and a half years ago! God, I was just about to turn 27. That seems like yesterday.  So I was younger but I still seem to be running better now. I don't know what's happened!

I've got a 5.2km route I do, down past the beach. I can do that no problem and my pace seems to be as good as it is going to get - the past few runs have been within a few seconds of each other. On Friday I ventured out, in the frost,  to complete it as per usual and I decided that if I felt good, I would try and extend it. Good I felt, extend it I did. Whaddya know - I had another 1.3km in me.

Yesterday I toyed with the thought of going back to bodypump but  I was actually quite keen to try running a bit longer again. That's right. I just used KEEN and RUNNING in the same sentence! WTF? So  off I trotted. And then I trotted some more. And I kept trotting until I had trotted a total of 7km - and it was my fastest pace yet! I couldn't believe it. I am so pleased with myself.

That achievement and also feeling a bit slimmer... I feel really great just now. I'm proud of myself and I just need to keep rolling.

I'm also proud of all the hard work we're putting into our home - and TB's dad too.  We've spent hours each week preparing and painting our front room. We've finally finished the wood work and have undercoated a good bit too - goodbye green ceiling! At the weekend we even managed to get some of the colour on the walls. THANK GOD. I cannot wait to be finished and to do fun stuff like rearranging cushions!  My hand can't take much more.

Weigh in

As I mentioned, I don't feel any thinner this week compared to last week. It seems the scales, those bloody lovely scales, would disagree though. 1.75lbs off.

I can't quite believe this. I'm losing weight like never before. Well, like the 2stone weight loss of 2011 actually. But I'm telling you, it seems easier this time round.

In 2011 I felt like I had to devote a lot more time and effort to get the same results. I was working out 5 days a week and really spent a LOT of time thinking about the whole escapade. I was also cycling everywhere. I used to do a circuits class and cycle 4 miles home afterwards! And I was living on my own so I didn't have to make meals that would satisfy TB as well as myself. 

Whatever I am doing this time - it seems to be working. And long may it continue!

Totally unrelated, the room I work in at home is flipping baltic so I'm constantly in a bobbly old cardi and scarf - oh and kitten. I think he thinks he's a parrot.


Starting Weight: 14 stone 0.25lbs
Current Weight: 12 stone 11.25lbs
Weight Loss This Week: 1.75lbs
Total 2013 Weight Loss: 1stone 3lbs

Ride on time

There is a post that has been brewing inside my noggin for some time, all about wedding planning.

I've got a lot to say on the matter but I need to take my time with it - and time is not something I have today.Work is chocca just now, which is good but I just feel like I am running around feeling guilty all the time.

When I work from home I feel like I'm always trying to fit too much in - cooking, cleaning, running, looking after the cats, wedding stuff, house crap (getting blinds measured/phoning plumbers)  - and that is all before I've even thought about doing any actual proper work. When I'm going that stuff I feel guilty about not doing enough work work and vice versa. There is just never enough time. Tonight we're painting the ceiling of the living room - and I'll also need to do washing and dishes. Waaaaaaa! Sorry - just feeling a bit overwhelmed with it all just now.

So it's weigh in tomorrow. Apart from Saturday's meal out and a few handfuls of crisps here and there, I've been on track. I've also run 5.2km, twice and been to spinning and bodypump. Despite seriously wanting to body-swerve swimming last night I went - but I didn't even get into the pool. Who knows what the hell was going on but it was rammed with kids. I honestly could not have swam a stroke - there were that many of them. Instead I sat in the sauna for a bit - and then went home! What a waste of time.

Regardless, that's four workouts in seven days, which I am pleased with. I don't feel any thinner/different than last week but we shall see what the scales are giving to it in the morning.

Wipeout

What up peeps!

I am tired, my limbs are sore and I am hungry. This is for several reasons.

Firstly, we finally started painting our living room last night. Finally! All the rubbing down and sanding is over - horay! But now we are faced with the reality of how long the painting will take. Last night it took me a few hours to paint one cupboard. Admittedly, it's a massive cupboard and I did all the edging and cornice edges around it too - but my god, s..l...o...w... An evening of boring painting will tire you out.

Holding my paintbrush up above my head and at awkward angles will also tire out limbs that bodypumped earlier that day. Yes, I went to my once favourite class and pumped my ass off! I was not looking forward to it but I actually quite enjoyed myself and I might even go back - shock horror. Today, though... my thighs are pretty sore and I am feeling pretty wiped out.

The reason I ended up going to pump in the first place is that following a lovely meal out with TB's folks on Saturday night, I knew I had over indulged and so on Sunday morning I forced myself out for a run - just over 5km. It ended up being a really good run and I was so chuffed with my time and how pacey I felt throughout the whole thing. I might have been ready to spew in the moments afterwards - but the run itself felt good. Anyway, having run on Sunday I thought I should try and mix things up a bit yesterday.

I'm also feeling weary and hungry because my period is just days away. I'd like to think it would get here before Thursday's weigh in but it'll  probably rock up on Friday, just cause it likes to mess with me like that. It may or may not be related but I have found that the past few days have been a little picky, with the odd handful of crisps here and there - and the odd cracker with cold meat. I need to knock that on the head.

I really cannot be arsed going swimming tonight but I know it'll help my sore muscles and it'll also keep m from constantly wandering through to the kitchen, looking in cupboards.

Weigh in

What do you get if you add 1 and 2? Well, yeah... three. But that's not what I mean  AND YOU KNOW IT!

TWELVE. You get twelve! Yes, you might have realised thanks to all the block capitals that I am back in the 12s! Whooppeeeee! WHOOPPEE!

I lost a whole two pounds. Two big fat pounds. Gone! I am pleased. Very pleased! I am firmly in the 12's and just four pounds away from my all time low. Holy crap, it's just sunk in how close I am. Bloody hell.  That's insane. If I keep focused I could be, dare I say say it, in FF (fresh fat) for Christmas. It's been a long time since I uttered the FF phrase. Oh my.

We've got a weekend of painting and decorating ahead of us this weekend so that's more general activity and little temptation but we are going out for a lovely meal on Saturday night with the future in-laws which I'm slightly concerned about. You know what it's like, wine with the meal is how it goes. Wine is not my friend. I'm just going to have to drink slowly and intersperse it with water. Until then... soups, fish, spinning, running and thinking positively.

Onwards.


Starting Weight: 14 stone 0.25lbs
Current Weight: 12 stone 13lbs
Weight Loss This Week: 2lbs
Total 2013 Weight Loss: 1stone 1.25lbs

PS) I've changed my wee updater thingymabob. It was getting out of hand! I've also changed the starting weight to what it would be on my new scales. 

Ring the changes

Tomorrow is weigh day and I wouldn't exactly say I am looking forward to it, but I am definitely interested to see what the numbers have to say about the past week.

However, I'm mentally preparing myself to deal with a result I don't want (as happens all too bloody often) by taking a moment to concentrate on some changes I have noticed that actually mean more than what the scales decided to say.

The one that I am noticing all the time is something the lovely Peridot mentioned a few weeks ago... my engagement ring is looser. Well, she mentioned hers was looser, not mine! It was always a bit big as I wasn't willing to give it up to get resized the day we got it. but now it's positively spinning from side to side and wobbles about when I move my hand. So, that'll be all the time. So fingers are definitely slimmer. Yay! Just what I always wanted... ahem.

Ummm, what else. Oh yeah. Boobs. Of course, the girls are smaller. As per usual. They don't really look much smaller but there is bra gaping going on that tells  me otherwise. Although, that could mean that my back is slimmer...

Last night when I was swimming I felt as if I wasn't so much hauling my bulk through the water but rather gliding, in places. And I felt my stroke was faster. That's only my third week of going but it gave me motivation to make sure I keep going back. That's not really to do with feeling thinner, but definitely fitter.

In other news, last night I made a Victoria sponge cake and 12 mini ones (i.e. fairy cakes with jam hidden inside and topped with buttercream icing). There was icing left over... I put it in the bin.  Bring on the scales!

Stop and smell the roses

I had such a great weekend. TB was away for most of it and I had so much time to myself.

The weather was lovely. How nice to wake up to the sun streaming in my bedroom window. I woke up energised, hangover free and set about kicking the arse out my to do list. Not only did I go to the gym, varnish the floor, do some work, do 2 loads of washing, clean floors and cook, but I also did some gardening. What's that all about?!

Well, it's more about the shame than anything else. Our front garden is a rose garden but there are more weeds than roses and it looked awful. I was so embarrassed, I couldn't stand it  a moment longer. It looks SO much better now but there are still so many weeks. Chickweed - what the chuff? I've been reliably informed that's what is spreading like wildfire. It was a very dull job but at least that's it done... till the next time.

Of course, there was also plenty of time snuggling with the kittens (who are getting so big!). They are so funny; when they are sleepy they just lie about anywhere and you can do anything to them. There are actually two cats in that picture but Papa Lazarou is so black he's impossible to photograph.

The diet is still going really well. Really well. One glass of red wine and a small milky bar were just about my only treats. Oh, and nibbling at some ciabatta. But I was active all weekend. In between the cleaning, shopping, gardening and general house stuff, I hardly sat down.

Yesterday I had a bit of time to go shopping after a meeting and the next thing I knew I had bought a knee length, dark grey coat - in size 14! Yeah, it's a bit nippy around the bottom - but it fits. Today I've got a dress on that I've not worn for weeks and it is the loosest I can ever remember it being!

I've only managed to go for a run (new fastest 5k time!) and a spin class since weigh in, and possibly swimming tonight if I don't have to help TB with something, so not quite as much exercise as I would like. A loss of a pound and a quarter would take me into the 12's so that's what I've got my sights on so it's eyes on the prize and heads down and we enter the final furlong of the dieting week.

White Christmas

A quiet night in, saving money and then.... BOOM!

M&S advert on the telly and next thing I know I've bought this sucker. Work Christmas night out... hello!

Weigh in

A pound she wanted.... a pound she got!

Wheeeee - I am happy with that. I'm now 13stone 1lb. And on the old scales... okay - no more. From here on in the old scales are dead and I'll stop comparing numbers. This loss brings me soooo.close to hitting a stone lost since we moved into our house. Yup, it's been slooooowoowowowooowww but I did go on holiday to Crete for a week of that. Whatevs, the numbers coming down, no matter how long it's taking.

Numbers aside, I am starting to notice a difference in my clothes. Last night TB and I played badminton and I am telling you, my stretchy gym trouser/legging things kept falling down when they were fine the week before (obvs that's why I lost every sodding game!). Well, until I heated up a bit and my sweaty body helped them cling to me. I'm a sweater - okay!

I've got a dress on today that was never too tight but now, well let's be honest, it fits a lot better. It's at times like this I think "You are such a tool". It's only taken 5lbs for me to feel SO much better about myself. I'm holding my head a little higher, my walk's got a little more swagger. Why have I been dicking about for so long when a few weeks of focus can make me feel this good?

Week 1:   13 stone 11.75
Week 2:   13 stone 9.75  (- 2lbs)
Week 3:   13 stone 7.5    (- 2.25lbs)
Week 4:   13 stone 8.5    (+ 1lb)
Week 5:   13 stone 6.25  (- 2.25lbs)
Week 6:   13 stone 2.5    (- 3.75lbs)

Week 7:   13 stone 2.25  (- 0.25lbs)
Week 8:   13 stone 4.5    (-0.25lbs)
Week 9:   13 stone 4       (-0.5lbs)
Week 10: 13 stone 3.25  (-0.75lbs)
Week 11:  13 stone 2.5   (-0.75lbs)
Week 12:  13 stone 4      (+1.5lbs)
Week 13:  13 stone 2.5   (- 1.5lbs)
Week 14:  13 stone 2.5   (0)
Week 15:  13 stone 5.75 (+ 3.25)
Week 18:  13 stone 6lbs  (+0.25)
Week 19:  13 stone 2lbs  (-4lbs)
Week 20:  13 stone 1lb   (-1lb)

Total: 13.25lbs

On the floor

What a weekend. After a pretty boozy Halloween party on Friday night, the rest of the weekend was spent sanding the hell out of our floor boards. 

Well, before we even started the sanding part we had to use a hand held grinder to get this dark brown paint off which ran round the whole room. On Sunday morning it took make ages to wonder why the hell my wrists were aching! Oh yeah, holding that heavy thing which vibrated like a mother, that'll be it.

We're getting there though! You can see from the top pics the room has some lovely dark green wallpaper and the carpet (under all the mess) was dark green too. Now it is looking SO much lighter and brighter. I took these pics when it was dark outside  so it doesn't really do it justice. This week we now have to varnish it and then crack on with sanding all the paintwork - including out massive skirting boards. That'll be fun... aye....

During this DIY blitz, the diet was rumbling along quite the thing. Slice of toast for brekkie, crackerbread with low fat cream cheese and smoked salmon for lunch, home-made ww chicken curry for dinner.

Yesterday I also cracked out 5k in my best time for about 2 years - hello 33mins. And that was outside, up and down hills into a headwind half the time. I'm also going swimming again tonight. I have a pound loss in my sights for Thursday morning. I'm coming to getcha!

Weigh in

Pow POW! 4lbs off.

I am so chuffed. That means I am 13 stone 2lbs - the lightest I have been this whole year (and in old money/scales I would be in the 12s)!

4lbs in one week is a lot for me and so I 'm sure that gain of 0.25lbs last week was all smoke and mirrors. Even so - that averages out at 2lbs a week. It's not often I see results like that.Wheeeee!

I definitely screwed the nut this week though. Portions were smaller and there was a lot of homemade soup - and no bread. I think that's been key - cutting out the extras that I 'think' I need. I've got this fear of going hungry and if I don't feel full I worry that it will happen. I'm not sure what I think the consequences of being hungry are, mind you.

I also did a fair bit of moving this backside of mine.

• Spinning
• 5k run x 2
• Swimming

I feel so much more positive now. I am going to get into the 12s properly. I am going to keep that number coming down. I am going to do this. 

Week 1:   13 stone 11.75
Week 2:   13 stone 9.75  (- 2lbs)
Week 3:   13 stone 7.5    (- 2.25lbs)
Week 4:   13 stone 8.5    (+ 1lb)
Week 5:   13 stone 6.25  (- 2.25lbs)
Week 6:   13 stone 2.5    (- 3.75lbs)

Week 7:   13 stone 2.25  (- 0.25lbs)
Week 8:   13 stone 4.5    (-0.25lbs)
Week 9:   13 stone 4       (-0.5lbs)
Week 10: 13 stone 3.25  (-0.75lbs)
Week 11:  13 stone 2.5   (-0.75lbs)
Week 12:  13 stone 4      (+1.5lbs)
Week 13:  13 stone 2.5   (- 1.5lbs)
Week 14:  13 stone 2.5   (0)
Week 15:  13 stone 5.75 (+ 3.25)
Week 18:  13 stone 6lbs  (+0.25)

Dressed for success

Sorry, I didn't really meant to leave yesterday's post as a dum dum DUUUUUUM type of cliffhanger. It was just getting a bit long and I had shit to do, people!

Aaaaanyhooo  - appointment number two...

We arrived and the lady who owns the shop let us in. It was just us and her, surrounded by a sea of ivory. I explained what I thought I was looking for but this time I added in the work 50's. Yes, somehow I thought I quite liked the idea of a 50's feel.


This particular shop deals in samples and other dresses which have been perhaps tried on and maybe even worn once and what they have in is what they have. This means they also have them on their website and when browsing this one caught my eye. It also means they prices are MUCH more reasonable.

Isn't it beautiful? The back is low as well which I loved. What I didn't love was the size. 8/10. Ouch. Even if I lost 4 stone I would never be that size. My bones ribs would kinda stop that.  It was this dress that I had mind though and based on that June, the wonderful owner, pulled out around six dresses she thought would be right for me.



The first one I tried on was beautiful. Satin, alabaster in colour and strapless - a very similar shape to the one above. As I'm not too sure about showing off a whole lotta arm, June popped on a shrug type thing. It was lace and you put it on front ways so that it does up at the back. It's fitted so it sits right in against the dress and looks like it is part of it. I really liked it but when I slipped the shrug off my shoulders so it was more like the ones in the pics I posted up the other day, I loved it. Loved. It. It was also the perfect fit and length.

I tried on the rest of the dresses but we just kept comparing them to the first one. Once I had tried them all on I went back to the beginning. I put on the first dress and asked my mum did she think it could be the one. "It's everything I hoped it would be", she said as she started to cry.

So we went for it! The dress is mine! We couldn't actually believe it happened. It's done - the dress is bought. I think we're both in shock still. We're going back in the New Year to get the bolero made exactly as I want it and in the lace I want. And then back again for fittings - cause of course it will need to be taken in 8 sizes. Ha!

I just love it so much. And even if I didn't lose another ounce, I could get married in it and feel amazing. Oh my god - I'm getting married. I know what I'll be wearing when I get married. 

Dress rehersal

So... guess what I bought on Saturday.... OH YEAH - my wedding dress!

It feels pretty amazing and totally weird to write that down. I'm getting married - it kinda reminded me what this whole jinkaboodle is about. I'm marrying the most amazing person I could hope to love.

But enough about love and all that mush - let's talk about the dress!

Well, even before we get to the shop, there was a problem. I was meeting my mum 2 hours away by train, at 10am for our first appointment. I made it to the train station by the skin of my teeth (I really must stop doing that) only to note the sodding train had been cancelled! The next one would mean I was over half an hour late. Oh no. Not cool. I booked this appointment weeks ago! After almost murdering the woman behind the till who informed me of my bad luck, I decided to drive despite having paid for a return ticket.

I jumped in the car and hit the road - for about half a mile before the engine light came on. As you can imagine I was most delighted by this situation and was almost in tears as I made my way back to the station with no option apart from turning up very late for my appointment. This  was all pre 8am. What a bloody morning.

Luckily for me, my mum got there in plenty of time and warned them I was running late and they said it wasn't a problem to let me stay on a bit longer. Phew!

Eventually I arrived and I was sat down in some very lovely surroundings and asked what I was looking for. "Something fitted on the top half, in at the waist but quite full in the skirt. I'm also not too sure about showing too much flesh on my arms and so strapless might not be right for me." We went over to look at the rail of dresses and oh lordy, that was some rail. Meters and meters long. But we only seemed to look at one small section and four dresses were taken from here - and I felt like I barely looked at the different options. They knew this was my very first appointment - a little more guidance/variation would have been better.

They started to put me in the dresses and I wasn't really sure what to think. Most of them were huge. I'm talking -kick my feet out in front of me to walk- huge. And netting, visible netting, a lot of that as well as very heavy lace. I'm definitely up for a bit of lace but the whole of each dress was covered in it. It was just too much and oh my god, the price! Out of these four the one that I liked the most was over £2,000 and that is before any of the accessories. Holy crap. I knew some of them were going to be expensive but to be hit with that price tag so quickly was not what I expected.

Mum and I left the shop not really knowing what to think apart from "this is going to be a long and expensive process." We had lunch and headed off to our next appointment.

Dress dreaming

As I have mentioned tomorrow is the day I go wedding dress shopping!

I'm putting aside all the negative thoughts and I am really looking forward to it. If nothing else it's a day out with my mum and we can laugh at all the horrific dresses we see!

I've done a little thinking about what I'd like and what I think would suit me. I'm pretty sure I don't want strapless but I would quite like to show off a little back so I reckon this sort of thing might do the trick....

Weigh in

I'm pretty pissed off. This week I managed to put weight on. A quarter of a pound.

What the actual flip is going on? I'm doing that thing where I think back over the past week. Where did I slip up? Did I actually kid myself on about how good I was being.

There were a few occasions when I let some things slip through (wine and baklava) but really - there was not much else. And on top of this, the exercise is the most I have done in a long, long time. I worked out 5 times in 7 days. The last time that happened must have been well over a year ago. And they were great workouts.

• Badminton singles x 2
• 5km run x 2
• Kettercise class

Because I didn't weigh myself when we got back from hols it feels like I've been putting in a bucket load of effort with zero return. Well, not true. There has been return  - the return of a quarter of a pound!

I'm doubly pissed off (yup, it keeps coming) because mum and I are going to look at wedding dresses on Saturday. I'm already feeling a bit anxious about it all. My plan was to do so knowing that I was making inroads to losing some weight and to focus on that positivity. Well, that's clearly not happening now.

Despite being totally scunnered with the whole thing, I know I've got to keep on keeping on. What choice do I have? BIG FAT ZERO. I'm FAR from happy about it but I simmered down, I've had a 100% day and I sweated myself close to death at spinning.

Oh arse of mine, you will not beat me. 

Week 1:   13 stone 11.75
Week 2:   13 stone 9.75  (- 2lbs)
Week 3:   13 stone 7.5    (- 2.25lbs)
Week 4:   13 stone 8.5    (+ 1lb)
Week 5:   13 stone 6.25  (- 2.25lbs)
Week 6:   13 stone 2.5    (- 3.75lbs)

Week 7:   13 stone 2.25  (- 0.25lbs)
Week 8:   13 stone 4.5    (-0.25lbs)
Week 9:   13 stone 4       (-0.5lbs)
Week 10: 13 stone 3.25  (-0.75lbs)
Week 11:  13 stone 2.5   (-0.75lbs)
Week 12:  13 stone 4      (+1.5lbs)
Week 13:  13 stone 2.5   (- 1.5lbs)
Week 14:  13 stone 2.5   (0)
Week 15:  13 stone 5.75 (+ 3.25)
Week 18:  13 stone 6lbs  (+0.25)

Get kettle on love

It's only Wednesday but already it feels like a lo o o o o o o ong week.

I think it's because I weighed myself on Thursday and have been pretty much* doing a cracking job every since and that includes 4 workouts - 2 runs, badminton and today was kettlercise. I know, what is that name all about?

The name might be crud but oooooh mamma! It's not even 12 hours since I did the class and I am having some serious problems going up and down the stairs. To explain what the class is.... you have a kettlebell and with said kettlebell you do a series of 37 different moves - each one a minute long. Think lunges, tricep dips, bicep curls, squats. I thought it wasn't going to be hard as mostly I (and the rest of the class) were using 4kg bells. Sometimes 6kg. Wrong. So wrong.

The music didn't stop. There were no breaks people! I have not sweated like that since I used to go to spin at Virgin in a tiny wee studio. There were rivers of sweat running down my shins. RIVERS! SHINS!

*okay, so I had a few chocs and tiny piece of baklava on Sunday.

Bakalving your work

It's not often I get one of these, a Saturday morning at home, on my own just pottering around - and writing a wee blog. Bloody lovely.

Despite eating some baklava last night (which I made for my book club night and I knew I was most certainly having a portion of) I am feeling very positive.

I played badminton for 40 mins on Thursday night and yesterday I ventured out for a run - the first for weeks - and got a wee 5k under my belt. I'm also planning some sort of exercise on Monday and Tuesday - so that will be four workouts before next weigh in.

I have my eyes set on a 2lb loss next week. I feel like will give me a bit of confidence for Saturday. What's happening on Saturday? Oh you know, just trying on some massive white dresses! You got it - mum and I are going wedding dress shopping. It's just two appointments and while I am dreading the whole thing, I'm anxious to get going and see what what's what.

Right, best be off. TB and I, along with his parents are going to my parent's for the dinner and are staying over. It's a bit of a wedding celebration/planning session.

I've got a whole other post of wedding planning and how I'm feeling about it all (and people criticising!) but in the meantime, let's just enjoy a picture of delicious, buttery, sugary, fatty baklava.

Weigh in

I wasn't really worrying too much abou this morning's weigh in.

I've been on holiday and so fully expected a gain. However, having been flipping amazing each and every one of the five days since I got home, I really hoped the damage wouldn't be too bad.

3.25lbs on. It's not THAT bad but I must confess, it's more than I expected it to be. Lord knows what it would have been if I had weighed myself on Saturday! Let's not even think about that.

So this is it. From now until the wedding day - it's hell for leather. I've actually found this week to be quite easy to get back into the swing of things. I've been hungry for sweet things but I've just distracted myself and got on with it.

I've also had every meal planned which has been key. Lunches have been tasty leftovers that I've got frozen in indivudual portions or some of my home made chicken broth. Evening meals have been...

• Pad Thai
• Roast chicken and veg
• Low fat chiken curry
• Salmon and veg
• Fritatta and sweet potato wedges
• Lamb tagine

I've snacked on fruit and in the evening after tea I've had a shape chocolate mousse thing. God, it sounds so simple and easy when written down like that! It just shows what a difference being organised makes.

Tonighth is my first night back into the exercise groove. TB and I are going to play badminton. That's always a really great workout and one I am actually looking forward to.

Week 1:   13 stone 11.75
Week 2:   13 stone 9.75  (- 2lbs)
Week 3:   13 stone 7.5    (- 2.25lbs)
Week 4:   13 stone 8.5    (+ 1lb)
Week 5:   13 stone 6.25  (- 2.25lbs)
Week 6:   13 stone 2.5    (- 3.75lbs)

Week 7:   13 stone 2.25  (- 0.25lbs)
Week 8:   13 stone 4.5    (-0.25lbs)
Week 9:   13 stone 4       (-0.5lbs)
Week 10: 13 stone 3.25  (-0.75lbs)
Week 11:  13 stone 2.5   (-0.75lbs)
Week 12:  13 stone 4      (+1.5lbs)
Week 13:  13 stone 2.5   (- 1.5lbs)
Week 14:  13 stone 2.5   (0)
Week 15:  13 stone 5.75 (+ 3.25)

Total: 8.5lbs

Good times died on Saturday

I have returned from my hols and I just don't know where the hell to start with a blog post.

There are so many areas I want to wax lyrical about but there just ain't the time and quite frankly, I've been so poop with my posts it's feeling pretty quiet around here so there might be the odd spam bot (hee hee  - BOT!) that is reading them! Whatevs - I shall blether on regardless and let's start with what's at the heart of this here blog, the big ole fatty fatterson issue.

I was on my game big time in the run up to the holiday and I weighed in the morning we flew out to Crete (which was lovely by the way). I had stayed the same which I was okay about. I lost 1.5lbs the week before that perhaps was a little generous so, okay.

I went on hols and oooooooooh weeeeee! Do I really need to spell it out for you? There was a lotta drinking, there was a lotta eating. I had a gooo-oood time. But those good time, my friend? They are over. They are done. No more. Good times = DEAD.

I got home at 4.30 in the flippin AM on Saturday and since then... oh lordy. It is game on! I might feel like utter poop thanks to the mother of all colds I caught while on hols, but I am a lean mean non-eating machine, or something like that. You get the gist, right... I am the picture of eating perfection. For once I even have planned all my meals for the whole week. Check me!

And because I am having a small moment of wedding excitement (amongst the mainly overwhelming feeling I have) did I ever show you my emmefffing bling?! That is also a kitten yawn in the background. Too much cute. TOO MUCH.

17th May 2014

227 days. It looks like we're going to be married in 227 days!

Waaaaaaahaaaaaaa! We just emailed the venue this morning and so it looks like it's all systems go!

And here is! This is where we are going to get married!

Well, we're actually going to get married at the side of the house on a lovely bit of lawn and then have the reception in the walled garden in a marquee. You can see the walled garden at the top of the picture. It's going to be amazing! So yes, there are many many issues that need overcome (wet weather back up/pathway to the garden/lighting in the garden) but we I know we can do it! 

Weigh in

So farking busy! Just time to say, I put on 1.5lbs the other week. Last weigh in, I had lost it again.

I was pretty chuffed with that as it's the biggest loss I've had in a long time. Maybe I didn't 'really' put it on in the first place. Who bloody well knows.

So I'm back to where I was - 13 stone 2.5lbs. But BUT I'm going on hols on Friday. I want to try and be good. I just have to talk myself into it.

Week 1:   13 stone 11.75
Week 2:   13 stone 9.75  (- 2lbs)
Week 3:   13 stone 7.5    (- 2.25lbs)
Week 4:   13 stone 8.5    (+ 1lb)
Week 5:   13 stone 6.25  (- 2.25lbs)
Week 6:   13 stone 2.5    (- 3.75lbs)

Week 7:   13 stone 2.25  (- 0.25lbs)
Week 8:   13 stone 4.5    (-0.25lbs)
Week 9:   13 stone 4       (-0.5lbs)
Week 10: 13 stone 3.25  (-0.75lbs)
Week 11:  13 stone 2.5    (-0.75lbs)
Week 12:  13 stone 4      (+1.5lbs)
Week 13:  13 stone 2.5   (- 1.5lbs)

Total: 11.75lbs